Often us women compare ourselves to others. I hear all the time that facebook makes us feel inadequate in our own lives. We all feel that pressure to ‘DO IT ALL’. So when I see this trio of women who are all mothers (thirteen kids between them) who also get to do something that the enjoy. So when I heard they were stopping by to share their new CD, I had to know… Do they have it all? How do they deal with the pressure. You can see them rehearsing here.
Whitney from Mercy River is here to share with us how she tries to find the balance.
STEP TWO: CONSIDER YOUR DESIRES
For example, I wrote a song for the album that really meant a lot to me personally, but it wasn’t receiving rave reviews from my producers. I struggled…wanting the song to go on the album…but then came back to my DESIRE. I would repeat to myself, “I do Mercy River because I desire to be an instrument in the Lord’s hands.” Did I need that song on the album to be an instrument in His hands? No. So I let it go. Identifying true desires gives you freedom to not sweat the small stuff anymore.
Think about it this way. Would we ever say:
“I have this job because I desire to stress my husband out.”
“I do this hobby because I desire my children to watch too much TV.”
“I am blogging up a storm because I desire to be a really lame Enrichment Leader.”
Nope. So…time for a gut check. What do you desire…and what is really happening? A good desire is great, but only if it does not threaten numbers 1 and 2 on your list.
STEP THREE: SET LIMITS
STEP FOUR: LEARN TO SAY NO
1–Girlfriend “things.” My girlfriends can attest that I’m the “loser” friend. The one that rarely attends book group or girls nights. This is a choice I had to make with such a “Big Extra” that already pushes my limits of being away from home. So…the girls get cut a lot. And yet, they remain my friends. They’re awesome.
2–Sleep. No one loves sleep more than I do. But on super busy weeks, when MR is threatening to be in Spot #1, I get my hiney to bed at a decent hour and out of bed at the crack of dawn to compensate. Sometimes I have to say NO to my lazy body.
3–Other GOOD things! A few years ago I was asked to be PTA President. This is something I would LOVE to do someday–but I had already chosen Mercy River as my “Big Extra.” And PTA President does not qualify as a “Little Extra.” So I had to say no.
STEP FIVE: PLAN WITH THE FAM!
C–Am I willing to neglect some of my favorite “Little Extras” to DO the “Big Extra”? (Because, remember? We can’t balance it ALL!)
D–Can I set realistic limits that are good for my family and learn to say NO when other things threaten to push those limits?
E–Can I commit to a weekly Family Council to maintain order and balance?